Album review: Brain Spasm’s ‘Toxic Monstrosities’

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Toxic Monstrosities

Toxic Monstrosities

Artist: Brain Spasm

Album: Toxic Monstrosities

Genre: Slam death metal / Goregrind

Rating: 2.5/5

Links: Facebook, Bandcamp, record label


The first album I listened to in 2016 was Chthe’ilist’s “Le Dernier Crepuscule.” It was a harrowingly evil instant classic that ultimately became my album of the year.

Brain Spasm’s “Toxic Monstrosities” is the first album I’ve listened to this year. It features a three-breasted abomination with a gigantic penis that cums part of the album’s name on its cover. Also the three-breasted abomination with a gigantic penis also has a penis on one of its two heads.

Also, “Toxic Monstrosities” is very, very unlikely to ultimately become my album of the year. God, I hope not, anyway.

So yeah, this is a goregrind/slam death record, if the album cover, band name, or record and song titles didn’t give that away. That might not inspire much confidence since sans early Carcass, this kind of music is usually reserved for those with unhealthy porn and gore obsessions. First looks can be deceiving though, even if the first look is the aforementioned three-breasted abomination with a gigantic penis.

Samples aside, “Toxic Monstrosities” is fast, straightforward and endearingly stupid. The production — everything, really — is noticeably sloppy and dissonant, but the songs are brief and fast enough to stave off the monotony usually associated with the genre. Damn if it isn’t good fun, though. Hell, the outro “The Ultimate Cover” is basically just the WWF “Ultimate Warrior Theme” atop some grinding. Why not?

Mercifully, the samples aren’t excessively long and are largely bereft of the gratuitous porn and gore soundbites that typically plague this kind of music.

Beyond that, the otherwise chunky guitars and pitch-shifted vocals come straight out of the slam death playbook and offer an apt mix of speed and brutal heaviness to suit any video gaming marathon or drunken headbanging session. Sure, it’s still kind of crap. But it’s crap with spirit! If one of the EP’s 8 indistinct songs came on via shuffle, that’d be OK.

Not exactly a glowing recommendation but you could do far worse for gore/slam. Stupid fun is still fun.

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